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Trim Job: A Manscaping Cheat Sheet

· Updated on October 28, 2021

We’re going to talk about something you all either do in secret for your sexy reveal or have no clue about.

Manscaping is defined as the grooming, shaving, waxing, or trimming of body hair for cosmetic effect, and let me tell you, this can be a pretty ‘hairy’ topic (too punny?). Some people think that being the way you were born is the way to go, and some people, frankly, are too lazy to give a sh*t. Ultimately, you should have a natural look while not looking like you’ve become a feral creature.

Let’s get to it. But before you start, make sure you’re equipped with the proper gardening tools. You’ll need:

  • A pair of trimming scissors that are small and not for arts and crafts. You can’t use a pair that you use anywhere else in the house…come on.
  • A beard trimmer that has different lengths so we can trim your beard and other parts of your body.
  • A clean razor (if applicable to your look).
  • Moisturizer.
  • And, most importantly, a good waxing salon if you want to cut the BS.

Face

Your face can say a lot upon first glance, and the most important message to send to anyone looking is that you are a clean and considerate individual. Whether you keep a bit of stubble or a Lord of the Rings style beard, it’s important to ensure it’s trimmed and moisturized. Nothing is worse than a dry beard that looks like you’ve been shipwrecked for years.

Use a beard trimmer every couple to days to keep all the hairs at the same length. Having strays and varying lengths makes you look tired and unkempt.

Back/Shoulders

Back hair is considered very unattractive. It can make you think of a greasy fat man, in tight shorts, exiting a hot tub at a public swimming pool with his back hair matted to his wet back (too much?). So, book an appointment at your local waxing salon. There’s no point being on the fence, and the pain is worth the look. If you decide to shave your back, the stubble will be very prickly. Meaning, what you gain in look, you lose in feeling and comfort. JUST GET RID OF IT.

Arms/Armpits

A hairy arm is attractive. It gives off a sexy, hard-working lumberjack vibe (and that’s the kind of guy you want to marry, or at least see a couple of nights a week). However, be mindful of the back of the biceps. That is a vastly overlooked area, and no one wants long stray hairs there. If you don’t want to wax it, at least use your beard trimmer to shorten the length, so it doesn’t look like your hairs are trying to reach out and grab people.

On a personal note: Armpits are, by far, my biggest ‘pit’ peeve. I find it distracting when someone wears a muscle shirt/vest, and their armpit hair is poking out from under their arm. Don’t get me wrong; I don’t think you should get rid of it completely. I mean, it’s good for sweat absorption, and it’s sexy, but it definitely needs to be trimmed to an appropriate length. It’s easy to do, especially when you are trimming your beard.

Down Below

This is the main event for most manscapers, but the question is: What should you do? Are you going for: a naked elephant trunk, a lion mane, or perhaps a cute porcupine that means no harm? Either way, the most common mistake for a lot of men is that they go straight in with a trimmer. It actually ruins your trimmer and can cause unnecessary ingrown hairs. Try trimming with scissors until you are close to your desired length, then fine prune with the trimmer. You should go for a natural length, whether that be an inch or less, and make sure it’s even all the way around. There is nothing worse than when the person you are intimate with takes a moment to pull out a long pube from their mouth.

Booty

The butt is an interesting area. Some guys really dig a hairy behind. I think the re-growth is more unattractive than someone who just trims the overall area. I would recommend just using a beard trimmer and lightly trimming on a medium/long length. If you don’t believe me, believe this…it makes you look a lot skinnier.

Additional Areas

We’ve covered some of the larger areas, but be sure not to forget these nooks and crannies:

  • Nose
  • Outer ear and inner ear
  • Knuckles
  • Toes

Finally, don’t go using wax strips all over the body, but definitely respect yourself enough to look handsome and, most importantly, groomed.

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