It’s mid-November, and if we’re going by the Mariah Carey calendar (we absolutely are) that means it’s basically Christmas already. We’re devoting more of our time to perusing online deals far ahead of Black Friday, and some devoted Internet sleuths are already finding a few items that we have no idea how we ever lived without.
Exhibit A: this Williams-Sonoma glass “Christmas Tree” decoration…
Hark! A beautiful way to adorn and add festive cheer to the Christian home 🎄 pic.twitter.com/OEjz0nJH05
— Jonny (@Jonny_Specs) November 13, 2022
It didn’t take long for Twitter users to notice something a little bit…reminiscent in the tree’s design.
Pic of the Williams Sonoma website. Item labeled as Spiral Art Glass Christmas Tree. It’s a clear rounded teardrop with thin spiraling red lines etched longitudinally around the teardrop. The ornament narrows to a thin support & flares out into a broad base.
it’s a butt plug https://t.co/j9bVyMrdUo
— ouinne, through the healing power of Christ (@ouinne) November 14, 2022
That you Williams Sonoma for normalizing this display of adult fun time novelties! https://t.co/RykUOHAV28
— Fafner (@FafnerDeUrsine) November 14, 2022
Now this isn’t a new item from Williams-Sonoma: apparently, they’ve been trotting it out at Christmas for four years now.
Pic of the Williams Sonoma website. Item labeled as Spiral Art Glass Christmas Tree. It’s a clear rounded teardrop with thin spiraling red lines etched longitudinally around the teardrop. The ornament narrows to a thin support & flares out into a broad base.
it’s a butt plug https://t.co/j9bVyMrdUo
— ouinne, through the healing power of Christ (@ouinne) November 14, 2022
Apparently it’s not the only “Christmas Tree” of its kind, either. Paris installed its own Christmas-themed butt plug some years ago, and Parisians remain unhappy about it. At least…some Parisians.
Paris walked so Williams-Sonoma could…kind of run. pic.twitter.com/0zmR0Vv87T
— turkey lurkey Jaimes (@JaimeVinings) November 13, 2022
There’s a proud tradition of installing butt plug Christmas statues across this fine planet! Who knew!
Just like the santa statue in Rotterdam pic.twitter.com/ZiQb4ocRsh
— Part-time cowboy, full-time dead – ACAB (@Sion_barzahd012) November 14, 2022
Very similar to the festive statue in Oslo… pic.twitter.com/8wEOMX02Or
— Malcolm Wilson 🏳️⚧️ 🦋🧜🏼♀️🧜♂️ (@MalcolmWilson01) November 13, 2022
Even IKEA tried to jump on the bandwagon:
Ikea was selling these last year pic.twitter.com/8D2mIjHUuv
— Joana Eça de Queiroz #don’t interact if under 18 (@Jo_EQ) November 14, 2022
It all goes to prove what we’ve always suspected: Santa and Mrs. Claus are in a poly, bisexual marriage and they love butt stuff.