To Nude or Not to Nude: When to Reveal Everything

The internet is forever.

I say that before getting into the do’s and don’ts of whether or not to send a nude to someone you’re chatting with because, above all else, whatever you send will officially be around for all of eternity.

Of course, we now have a First Lady of the United States who posed nude, so perhaps the rules are changing. But if you have any concerns about a pic coming back to haunt you, don’t send it. Hell, don’t even take it. Forget about your face being in it — people’s nudes have been called out by birthmarks, tattoos, and even one of a kind throw pillows.

So now that we have that out of the way, here are the rules of when to send a nude pic and when to just stick to a smiling pic. Of course, when a convo is getting heated, and you wanna seal the deal, you’re going to be tempted to send that X-rated pic. But how do you know when the time is right?

• HE ASKS — This seems rather obvious, but you’d be surprised how many people say “hi” and send a pic of their hole like it’s a handshake. News flash — not everyone wants to see your hole. Or your dick. A lot of people, in fact, want to see your face, chat for a bit, and then decide if they’d like to meet up in person and see more. But if you’re looking for sex or X-rated chat, and he wants to play ball and see what you’ve got, well — let the nude pics fly.
• HE UNLOCKS FIRST — Chances are, if he sends you a pic of his dick, he’s not looking for a pic of your dog in return. Sure, you can send a pic of you and Benji at the dog park, but assuming you like what you see — and you’re the type to send nudes — you’d better send it along with something decidedly more adult.
• HE’S LOOKING FOR FUN — i.e. his bio doesn’t read “no nudes.” If you send nudes to someone who says no nudes, you deserve whatever’s coming to you. But if he says he’s looking to get naked and bang, and you’ve got some naked pics you like to send, get your pics ready and have at it.
• YOU’RE ON VACATION — This might feel like a bit of an odd tip, but you know the phrase, “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas?” Well, what happens in a city you probably don’t plan to visit again, for the most part, stays in the city you don’t plan to visit again. So, if you feel like getting a bit dirtier than usual when you’re away from home, send whatever the hell pics you feel like. You don’t need to see this guy again, and even if he blocks you, who cares — you’re on the next plane out. He might just send them back — and then you have a whole new, glorious dick to add to the collection.
• YOU LEGIT DGAF — And frankly, this is the most compelling reason for you to send nude pics. Because you’re on an app for adults. It’s not like they don’t know what they’re getting themselves into. And if you don’t care and you’re proud of your pics, hell — show the world. Society is too uptight anyway. If he doesn’t like your dick, fuck him — or, in this case, don’t and just send your pic along to the next guy.