The gays are asking: Is posting too many thirst traps a turn-off?

In theory, posting a hot photo is a great way to get attention from someone you’re crushing on. But in practice, being too focused on your social media presence may hurt more than it’s helping.

That debate was at the center of a recent post on Reddit. “Am I the only one who gets turned off very quick as soon as a gay has some sort of ‘fame’ on Insta, especially with public profiles and thousands of followers?” asked one user. “It would be way more attractive if a dude has his own private life with private socials and won‘t show everything to the whole world? Why are many gays so thirsty for attention?”

The post got a range of replies. Some sided with the original poster, saying that posting too many thirst traps is a “big indicator of shallowness, attention seeking and potential instability.”

“Someone sharing their creativity is one thing (interesting photos etc). But endless carefully constructed shots of your body and your expensive but banal holidays is another,” that user continued. “What are you trying to prove?”

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They also shared a personal anecdote about the dangers of turning to social media for validation: “I know a guy in his 50s with a great muscular body who nonetheless has massive issues of self image. His Insta is thousands of gym photos, they all look the same to me, but he obsesses over how many likes they get and if one doesn’t go as well as he thought it can ruin his day. Looking at him you’d think he is someone to admire but actually knowing this I pity him.”

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A different user advised that it’s best not to judge a book by its cover: just like anyone else, some thirst-trapping gays are shallow, while others are more considerate. It’s always better to get to know someone and find out for yourself.

“​​I’ve known a few and it’s honestly a mixed bag of people who are down to earth, not superficial, and don’t believe their own hype, aaaannnndddd guys who are stuck up, superficial, and do believe their own hype,” they wrote. “And then there are ones I met who are straight up catfishing ☠️.”

Another pointed out that any activity that gets you attention is likely to become a habit.

“If you’re given compliments and attention from … anything quite frankly, you’re going to find that rewarding and want to continue replicating that,” they wrote. “It doesn’t mean they’re desperate, doing things that are rewarding feels good plain and simple.”

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Meanwhile, one user said that the issue may not be with the Instagays, but with those who are irrationally upset with their existence.

“I was thinking about that some months ago, and I think that doesn’t matter,” they wrote. “If the gay man wants to be famous for showing his body to everyone, it’s ok. I realized that the problem is with me because I started to compare myself with others, and then that started to make me feel sad about myself, so I just unfollowed everyone.”

Another user summed up that same sentiment: “I think being judgmental is vastly more unattractive personally.”

Long story short, for the sake of everyone’s mental health, mind your business. And if someone’s thirst trapping is a turn-off, good news! You don’t have to date them, hook up with them, or even follow them. Logging off is free.