These campy photos of a young Bernadette Peters are too gay too function

For straight people, high school prom is a time to show out in one’s floofiest dress, a corsage gleaming on one’s wrist, while parked at the bottom of your parents’ staircase. But for gay people, prom is something different entirely. It’s a time to do one of three things:

1. Be closeted and pretend everything is fine
2. Skip prom like a cool kid and drink beer in the deserted school gym
3. Be the (unlikely) queer kid who has an actual boyfriend (Kurt and Blaine style) who is willing to go to prom with you

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In the past, of course, there was only one option: the first one, which stipulated that we get dressed in upsettingly dated attire and attend the straightest, crappiest event of the year on the arm of some person who we decided to go with last minute so we wouldn’t have to go alone. And yes, I am very obviously spilling my own tea here, but I am not the only one. Witness, for example, this incredible tweet that really says it all:

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If you’re wondering who in the hell that red cowboy-booted guy is floating above Broadway legend Bernadette Peters is, it happens to be choreographer Christopher d’Amboise.

These stills were taken for Song and Dance, an obscure Andrew Lloyd Webber musical from 1985. But that doesn’t explain the sheer exuberance of d’Amboise in these photos: is he really that excited to be in Song and Dance? Is it just that being in the proximity of Bernadette is that exciting? Most of us, sadly, will never know.

It’s not easy to show Bernadette up, but d’Amboise did it.

The post even got folks talking about their queer prom moments…

“Slay the house down boots” just got new meaning.

Should you desire to watch Song and Dance in its entirely, someone on YouTube has you covered. It’s a great day to be gay!