No Thanks

Katy Perry is rebranding once again and the gays are not having it

In these times, it’s not enough for a pop star to go through one or two rebrandings. To be held up as an eternal diva on the order of Madonna or Lady Gaga, you have to rebrand ahead of every single album, and perhaps even more frequently, if you can manage it. To paraphrase Glengarry, Glen Ross, you gotta ABR: Always Be Rebranding.

But sometimes it still doesn’t quite work out, even if you try your best to heed this sage advice. Take Katy Perry, who has been on a gentle downswing ever since her era-defining 2010 album Teenage Dream. Perry has been through many a rebrand since that time: there was the sunkissed, club bop moment of 2013’s Prism, the blonde pixie cut/chicken nuggets post-divorce era of 2017’s Witness, a therapy-speak-drenched collection of extremely weird songs and vibes. And we of course can’t forget her most recent album, 2020’s confounding Smile, whose cover saw the pop star donning a red clown nose for no apparent reason.

But none of this has stopped Perry from continuing to release music, and something tells me that another album may soon be upon us. What’s telling me this? An extremely random photo shoot that seems to have taken place in the mind of someone who never lived in Bushwick in 2010, but has watched Girls.

Incredible she may indeed look—but the gays still aren’t having it.

There’s something about the attempt to be lo-fi and grungy here that rings instantly false: hence “Charli CVS.”

The Bushwickification of mainstream pop may have been 15 years in the making, but for some people it’s apparently just hitting the culture.

The people have not forgotten that you’re a Republican, Katy.

Rebrand all you want, Katy, but the gays will be occupied with Brat for at least the next 6 months.

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