Ruby Guest talks coming out to her mom, Jamie Lee Curtis

Over the past couple years, with anti-trans legislation advancing across the nation, Jamie Lee Curtis has been an active, outspoken advocate for her trans daughter Ruby Guest. From officiating Guest’s wedding to repeatedly modeling how to be a supportive parent on national television, Curtis has much to say on their loving relationship. Now, in a new interview with The Advocate, Guest is the one doing the talking.

Starting from the very beginning, Guest described how she first discovered that she was trans. “I realized around the age of 16 when a high school friend of mine asked me what my gender was,” she recalled. “It made me think, and it made me realize that I might be. But at the time, I had other factors that kept me from transitioning.”

Guest would eventually come out in 2020. Although Curtis has since thoroughly demonstrated her support, that doesn’t mean there was no anxiety at the time. “My wife actually convinced me [to come out],” Guest explained. “We were dating at the time, and she basically convinced me to tell my parents that I was trans.

“So, one weekend, I went to their house, and I didn’t actually tell them because the opportunity didn’t present itself. I messaged them afterwards and told them that I really wanted to tell them that I’m trans, so that’s how it came out.”

Curtis has been the first to admit that, after Guest came out, she had to educate herself on a lot of things. In a previous interview, Curtis explained, “I’m trying to learn the most important thing is that I don’t know everything.”

Guest now looks back on her mom’s initial reaction with a sense of humor. “Probably the funniest reaction, as [my mother, Jamie Lee Curtis] was trying to process everything, was that she wanted to know how much thought I’d put into this. And then her response was, ‘Well you know, men can wear dresses too.’ So that was funny.”

Now, like her mother, Guest can be a role model for other people. Her advice for trans youth is that while coming out does take a weight off your shoulders—safety comes first.

“It all depends. Different people have different situations,” Guest said. “Some, by hiding themselves, might be safe. But if you don’t think you’re going to get kicked out of your house or if you don’t think you’re going to be in mortal danger…then come out, because you’ll feel much more relieved, even if it’s just to your friends. Or tell someone you trust. Then you can start out on your path, which includes letting everyone know what your preferred pronouns are.”

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