The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills returned on Tuesday night and with any new season of the Bravo franchise comes brand new taglines. If you don’t know what a tagline is, it’s the one-sentence character summation a castmember says during the show’s theme music. Some are legendary shade see Atlanta’s Kandi Burruss while some are less housewife and more ho-hum. (Sam Smith’s notoriously bad “dick monster” tagline caused Patti LaBelle to give us a legendary face, though.)
Here’s a ranking of each of the taglines for Real Housewives of Beverly Hills’ eighth season:
6. Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave: “Having the best isn’t important to me. But being the best is.”
Starting at the bottom of the list is brand new housewife Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave. In the Housewives world, especially on Beverly Hills, having a memorable first season is the difference between a second tagline and an early axing. This extremely meh tagline sets her up as competitive, but we’re yet to see if she’ll follow through on that promise.
5. Lisa Rinna: “I don’t have to buy it. ‘Cuz I already own it.”
While this isn’t a bad tagline by any means, it comes off as kind of un-self-aware given how much trouble Rinna has had owning what she’s said and done in her time on the show.
4. Lisa Vanderpump: “The queen of diamonds always has an ace up her sleeve.”
Listen, Lisa arguably the most canonical entry in Housewives tagline history: “Throw me to the wolves and I shall return leading the pack.” While this doesn’t rank among the best taglines, it does beautifully summate Vanderpump’s talent for navigating the show’s drama while staying a fan favorite.
3. Kyle Richards: “Fam and friends come and go. But friends should not.”
Being able to throw a little shade at anyone, including fellow castmates, usually gives a tagline a great boost in memorability. (Like Camille Grammer’s famous shade to Kelsey Grammer in her second season RHOBH tagline.) Given that the cast is a musical chairs of shifting alliances and friendships, Queen Kyle Richards’ tagline is fitting.
2. Dorit Kemsley: “I believe in excess of everything. Except moderation.”
This is what a tagline is all about. Given that the Beverly Hills’ girls live the most opulent lives of any of the Housewives’ locales, a nod to the lifestyles of the rich and the famous, along with a classic witty twist makes this tagline go down real smooth.
1. Erika Jayne: “Some call me cold, but that’s not ice. It’s diamonds.”
Like Dorit’s tagline, this one refers to excessive lifestyles. But the tag also plays up that Erika Jayne, newly minted queen of gays and subject of a Saturday Night Live spoof, is not afraid of drama.