Hookup apps like Grindr and Sniffies are hellish enough when you can see who you’re talking to. But for queer folks with vision impairment, there are several extra challenges: How do you know who’s attractive in the first place? And if you do want to hook up, how do you get together?
Take TikToker Nikolas Quest, who is fully blind in one eye and can only see two inches ahead of him with the other. When a commenter asked Quest how he checks people’s pictures on the apps, he was happy to explain.
“I’m blind, and I get this question a lot,” Quest began. “I’m in a relationship now, but back when I used to use Grindr quite heavily, I would ask people. I’d be like, ‘Mom, does he look okay?’ I would ask my friends.”
“The platform’s already crazy and weird, so when I would go out with a guy, I would share my location with friends and family,” he continued. “Also, when it came to people driving me to my sneaky link, it would either be my grandma, my mom, or they would come pick me up. I’m sorry, I’m just being raw and real. Like, that’s what went down. I don’t drive.”
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“Nothing will humble a pharmacy tech more than dealing with a transgender patient.”
“Why should I feel bad for one of the very, very few advantages we have over straight guys?” mused one commenter on Reddit.
The thought of not only showing your mom men on Grindr, but having her then drive you to the hookup, had plenty of commenters doing a double take. Grindr itself even chimed in, commenting, “the women in your life are real ones.”
When one commenter wrote, “That is wild to me mom and grandma would drive u to get plowed by the trade 😂,” Quest replied with the evidence: a video of himself being driven to a truck stop, apparently for a hookup.
“Mom, it’s not a big deal,” he says in the video. “Just drop me off. Please? I love you.”
Quest has plenty of videos explaining what life is like as a blind gay man and answering his viewers’ frequently asked questions. That included how, if he can’t see other men, he determines who he finds attractive.
“It’s things like cleanliness. Their beard. I love body hair. Good breath. A deeper voice. I’m also a size queen,” he said in another video. “If I’m being honest, I think being blind allows me to judge people for their personality and not just physical characteristics.”
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