No one likes getting ghosted on a dating app. But this podcaster may have just invented something even worse.
On the podcast Sloppy Seconds, host Big Dipper was explaining how he vets his Grindr hookups. “What I actually do is I give them the apartment number across the street,” Dipper said, prompting raised eyebrows and dropped jaws from co-host Meatball and guest BenDeLaCreme.
When his gentleman callers arrive and wander around confused, Dipper looks out from his window to decide if they’re attractive enough to go through with the hookup. If they are, he’ll message them with the real address. If they’re not, he just stops replying — which leads to them potentially banging on his innocent neighbors’ doors.
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When Meatball points out that it’s “kind of mean,” Dipper replies that “it’s just a safety precaution.”
“These are guys that I’m messaging with no photos, completely random,” he explains.
That explanation doesn’t satisfy Meatball or DeLa, who agree that Dipper’s behavior is “deeply f*cked up.”
When the clip was posted to TikTok, folks in the comments were on the same page, pointing out that what Dipper sees as a safety precaution for himself is “at the expense of his neighbor’s safety,” as one user put it.
Others were quick to point out plenty of better ways to handle a situation like this.
“Ask for photos first, and if they won’t give them, then don’t waste both of y’all’s time,” suggested one commenter.
“That’s extra,” wrote another. “I wait till they show up to give apartment #. Sending them somewhere else is dangerous.”
And of course, if someone shows up and they’re not up to your standards, a simple message saying you’re no longer interested will suffice (and make things both clearer and safer for everyone involved).
The podcast clip also made its way to X, formerly Twitter, where it stirred up even more controversy.
“Gay men are so damn strange,” wrote one user. “That’s a lot of effort and wasted time when just simply expressing a boundary and saying ‘I’m not interested’ is beyond enough.”
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