For a lot of queer people, even the sight of a football rolling toward them will bring up traumatic memories of being hurt or excluded by school bullies who treated the soccer field like their kingdom. But, like all sports, football really is for everyone, and that’s becoming more and more apparent as the likes of Josh Cavallo and Jake Daniels start to speak up as professional players who just happen to be gay.
It seemed off then that Ted Lasso, easily the world’s biggest show on football, would avoid queerness almost entirely in its first two seasons. At best, this was a major oversight, and at worse, this absence reinforced the notion that gays and sports just don’t mix.
Thankfully, season three took that criticism and ran it off the pitch with a huge focus on queer storytelling this year through characters like Colin and Keeley.
Whether you like how their stories were handled is another thing entirely, but what’s important here is that Ted Lasso is finally gay, like super gay all of a sudden, just like all sports and anything sports-related should be. I mean, have you seen a jockstrap?
While we’re still waiting to see Jamie Tartt in one, plenty of other gay things have happened in Ted Lasso, so grab a towel and join us in the locker room as we count down some of the best.
Colin’s coming out story might have seemed random to some, but anyone who was actually paying attention would know that Colin casually name-dropped Grindr a whole season earlier when Keeley introduced her new celeb dating app, Bantr. They both skip the “e”, see? Even if you’re one of the few gays who didn’t become best friends with their English teacher at school, this was still a dead giveaway for Colin’s secret.
In a similar fashion, Ted Lasso hinted early on that Keeley was one of the alphabet people when she flirted with Rebecca tons back in season one.
Exhibit A: “If I’m going to dip my toe into the lady pool, I can’t think of a finer body of water to do it with than you.”
Exhibit B: “I feel like a teenage boy. I can’t stop staring,” Keeley said in response to Rebecca’s nudes.
Hannah Waddingham is an unbearably hot gay icon who became actual mother when she co-hosted Eurovision in the UK this year. If Keeley wasn’t bisexual before she met Rebecca, it makes perfect sense that she’d be into women now.
Sure, we were rooting for Keeley and Roy to make it work, but when season three started with their breakup, we knew it was only a matter of time before Keeley “dipped her toe into the lady pool.” And when she started making out with Jack a few episodes later, it was everything we could have hoped for and then some. To paraphrase Jennifer Garner in Love, Simon, “You get to exhale now, Sapphic Twitter.”
Colin put his knowledge of Grindr to good use in season three when he bagged himself a hottie who stayed over for more cute makeouts the next morning. If we’re ranking the gayest things that have ever happened in Ted Lasso, It doesn’t get much gayer than two men kissing, right? Well, how about two men kissing while another one watches?
Colin and Trent
What happens in Amsterdam stays in Amsterdam, unless it’s a beautiful coming-out scene between baby gay Colin and elder gay Trent. That’s the kind of moment that deserves to be shouted out from the rooftops. A natural high, if there ever was one. No, no, I’m not crying. You’re crying!
I Will Always Love Trent
You know what else deserves a shoutout? Trent’s rainbow mug. And you know what else? His Dolly Parton t-shirt. How anyone thought he would actually have the audacity to out Colin is just beyond me.
Locker Room Talk
Coming out isn’t just a one-and-done thing. Like watching Heartstopper or buying iced coffee, coming out is something that queer people have to do again and again throughout their lives. And so we come to Colin’s big moment in the locker room. Not the Sean Cody kind. The kind where he comes out to an entire football team and receives nothing but love and support. Is it realistic? Not exactly. But it is affirming, especially given the homophobia that still persists in real life football today.
“Your numbers are gay”
In the order of ultimate gay stuff, coming out is pretty high on the list, right above Kylie Minogue and being bad at math, but the gayest thing about Colin’s coming out scene has nothing to do with Colin at all. It’s the moment when Jan says that 10% of the team should be gay, statistically speaking, to which everyone turns round and stares at Jamie. Jamie’s flattered, as he should be, and with this comes confirmation that Gay Twitter isn’t the only place where Tartt’s coded queerness is accepted as canon.
Between the early-morning workouts and that riding lesson in Amsterdam, it’s safe to say that Jamie wants to ride Roy, and yes, the feeling’s probably mutual. Don’t believe us? If you still have any doubt that Jamie’s a fruity Tartt, look no further than Uncle’s Day. Yep, Jamie actually came to celebrate a holiday made up by Roy’s niece just to spend some time with him. Much like Jack in The White Lotus, Jamie is out to fuck an uncle.
And he even brought Roy a present too. That look Jamie gives when Roy says that he liked the gift is full of more love than any glance shared between Ted and Rebecca in what’s arguably the show’s dullest will-they/won’t-they. Grunt if you agree.
Jamie still keeps up a poster of Roy in his bedroom. That’s a full-grown man in love with another man right there.