The gays are asking: what’s the weirdest response you’ve gotten to coming out?

You’d think that in this day and age, coming out would be far from the agonizing process it was when most of us were kids. But you’d be surprised to learn that even in the year of our Lord Beyoncé Cowboy Carter 2024, people have some shockingly bizarre reactions to learning their friend, child, or coworker is queer.

On a certain subreddit, one poster recently shared a story about what happened when he—a straight-passing gay man, in his own words—came out to a coworker after years of being presumed straight.

“I’m gay,” he said. To which his coworker responded: “so that’s why you’re so nice and mature.”

That’s one of the more positive responses on record. As other posters started to chime in, we started getting into much weirder territory. Responses ranging from “okay,” to “you’re joking” to “I don’t believe you” soon filled the thread.

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There were some flirty responses, like “did you ever have a thing for me” (a dangerous question, posters agreed) and accusatory ones, like “so you’ve been gay this whole time!” In some cases, straight friends instantly became defensive. In others, the response led to a surprise hook-up. “I was at a club (gay club) I used to go to every weekend and a girl walked up and told me I was hot,” wrote one poster. “I was pretty high so it took a quick second to realize she was full on kissing me. I was like ‘whoa! I’m very gay.'” The girl left and came back later with a gay friend of hers, who he proceeded to hook up with.

“It’s always one of two polar opposites,” another poster wrote, “they’re either shocked to hear it or they shrug it off as if they’ve always known.”

“I came out to a girl and she said ‘oh we can go shopping together now!'” Someone else said. “Ma’am we have known each other for 6 years, what were all those mall trips? Target runs??”

Things clearly have come a long way from the dark ages when outing yourself could lead to discrimination and worse. The fact that most of the responses on the thread feel genuinely unbothered feels like progress. Then again, one poster told a story about coming out during the holidays that feels sadly familiar.

“Well I came out around Christmas time and my parents make it [a] point sometimes to let me know they think I only came out to ruin Christmas for them forever.”

That’s what being gay is all about, folks, especially if you ask John Waters. Here’s to ruining many more Christmases to come!